6 Ways You’re Being the Creepy Guy at the Gym

Behavior to avoid at the gym when it comes to the opposite sex

Going to the gym, for many people, is part of their weekly scheduled routine. It’s a familiar place you look forward to, or dread, depending on your mood. No matter when you choose to get your workout in, the gym is a familiar place with familiar people, full of other common gym-goers. You often recognize the usual suspects at the gym. You have your cardio junkies, nervous first-timers, grunting muscle men, Zen-like yoga enthusiasts, and high-energy CrossFitters. Unfortunately, you also have the “creepy guy” who might have been a normal gym-goer until he did one of the six following creepy moves every guy needs to know about to avoid the title of “Mr. Creeper.”

1. Blatantly Staring

Blatantly staring at a woman is definitely a creepy guy move. I get it—she’s hot, she’s got on the tightest pair of yoga pants you’ve seen, and maybe you even spot a camel toe. This isn’t a reason to drop your weights and ogle whatever body part has caught your eye. It’s extremely uncomfortable for any woman to be stared at like a piece of meat while working out. Women are at the gym to work out, not to get eye-f—ked. When you’re staring at a woman, it’s completely obvious to everyone around you, and you practically give yourself away as a level 10 on the Creep-O-Meter scale. Gentlemen don’t stare. Admiring a woman is one thing; staring is rude and unpleasant. You can appreciate a woman’s physique without making her feel uncomfortable.

2. Invading Her Personal Space

We all have a safe perimeter around us that we’re comfortable with that’s referred to as our personal space. Consider your personal space as the air between your body and an invisible shield, or bubble, you have formed around yourself for any relationship to feel safe. When it comes to strangers, you should keep your distance to about three to four feet. One and a half to three feet is fine among casual acquaintances and coworkers; you know, the people who you see on a regular basis at the gym who start to become familiar with you. The only time you would find yourself shoulder to shoulder with someone is if you might be grabbing the same weights at the same time, or possibly when getting off one machine and crossing someone’s body to let them use the machine. You should always be mindful of someone’s personal space, especially when you’re at the gym. Never ever stand face to face or inches away from a woman’s face to ask her a question or you’ll have her calling security.

Here are the average comfort levels of personal space distance in the United States:

• Approximately zero to 20 inches for intimate couples

• Approximately 1½ feet to 3 feet for good friends and family members

• Approximately 3 feet to 10 feet for casual acquaintances and coworkers

• More than 4 feet for strangers

• More than 12 feet for speaking to a large group

3. Constantly Interrupting Her Workout

When a woman goes to the gym, she is expecting to have a good workout and has the right not to be bombarded by men giving her unsolicited workout tips. Most gyms have their in-house personal trainers for hire, and if you don’t see a woman with one, this isn’t your cue to suddenly become her training partner. Like many dedicated gym-goers, they want to go to the gym, follow their workout, and leave. You can tell when the creeper looks for an opportunity to run to her workout rescue, and sometimes he’ll even touch her arm, legs, hips, or waist with the justification of correcting her posture or moves while performing her workout. I’ve seen either the look of shock and frustration with women who seem more annoyed by the gesture or comment. It screams, “Get away from me!” If you really see someone you’re interested in at the gym needing a hand or adjustment, don’t randomly approach her without asking her permission if you can share something with her about her workout. This gives her the choice to engage with you.

If you really want to strike up conversation, position yourself close to the lobby or in the hallway or exits where you can pass by and say hello. Do not interrupt her workout. It’s annoying behaviour that needs to stop.

4. Following Her Around

I’m not sure which action is worse: blatantly staring or obviously following a woman around at the gym. Both are pure signs you’re a creeper. Allow a woman to complete her workout and not feel like prey to a stalker. Following a woman around is bad etiquette and invades a woman’s sense of freedom. No one wants a gym stalker, especially when all you want is a good workout.

5. Taking Photos or Videos of a Woman at the Gym

The worst is when men bring their cell phones to secretly take photos of women. A woman shouldn’t feel like she has to watch out for the creeper paparazzi hiding behind her stair climber or the quad rack. A lot of women who take the time to put together an outfit do it for themselves. It’s not necessarily to impress the men. Gym clothing needs to fit comfortably, and if you’re planning to have a good sweat session, then lighter clothing is preferred. I get it, she’s super-hot and a picture lasts longer.

6. Showing Off at the Gym

Men showing off at the gym are equally bad. Grunting, moaning, and putting on more weight than you can handle is a bad idea. When the veins on your forehead are about to explode from the massive effort it’s taking you to lift 10 more pounds of weight than you know you can comfortably manage, you’ve gone too far. I see guys who put on so much weight to do one set of one rep when a pretty girl happens to be working out nearby. It’s as if their egos cue them to show the lady how strong they are. If you want to impress a woman at the gym, just do your own thing and complete your workout without announcing it to the entire gym with your grunts of bravado and testosterone increase. A smile and direct, brief eye contact is enough to let her know you’ve noticed her and expresses a subtle interest. Let her approach you if you want to avoid being creepy.

So, there you have six obvious ways a man can turn from a normal guy at the gym to a creepy guy you want to avoid. I am not saying all men display creepy behaviour; it’s sometimes unintentional. The next time you spot an attractive woman in yoga pants at the gym, ask yourself how you would behave if this was your sister or close girlfriend. What is the politest way for you to interact with her without causing her to squirm in yuckiness? Be mindful of your behaviour, and let’s all have a great workout!

Follow writer Carmelia Ray on social media platforms @carmeliaray or check her out HERE at her website.

Photos: Dave Laus

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